For those unaccustomed to Spanish regulations, an N.I.E number (numero de identidad de extranjero) is the document required if you wish to make a major purchase, like a motor vehicle, or even to obtain legal work in the country. Therefore, as this is a legal document, you would assume that obtaining one would be fairly straightforward. However, as this is the land that loves bureaucracy, you can rest assured that getting your hands on such a necessary piece of paper will prove to be awkward, infuriating and very time consuming.

To collect the form you will need to visit the National Police station as opposed to the local police station. In Spain, there are 3 different tiers of police each with different functions and duties: local, national and the guardia civil,. In theory, you would think, this would be a straightforward pickup involving no more than 10 minutes of your time.

But, on arrival at the Torremolinos police station, after being lulled into a false sense of security by the airy reception room, we were sent down the road to an adjacent building where, down some steps, we were greeted by the sight of loads of people milling about in a courtyard. Not a good omen. Our spirits sank further as our eyes were drawn to the tiny room that people were literally spilling out of. Matters did not improve much when we squeezed our way through and saw that there were more than 30 people squashed together inside the small waiting area. We then tried to find someone to speak to but this was easier said than done as the police have cordoned off the small office into 4 small areas and you can only reach the officer behind their desk by entering the small walkways they have created with partitions. Obviously, we were reluctant just to barge past everyone else who was waiting, so we joined the masses in the heat and began to slowly swelter.

As we looked around we could see people holding tickets but could not find a ticket machine to collect one ourselves. Likewise there were no signs indicating which queue to join and nobody in uniform to ask. As we were waiting we were lucky enough to find some English people with tickets and were able to find out that these are issued first thing in the morning to the first 50 people. Anyone without a ticket will not be seen and therefore our best bet was to return the next day, bright and early. In addition to this, if the police did not get through all 50 tickets, those unlucky enough to have waited all morning would also have to return the next day and go through it all over again.

So, the next day we arrived at 8 o’clock thinking, naively, that this would be early enough as the station did not open until 9. However, not only was it a mission to park along the backstreets, but we were greeted by an impossibly long queue running right down the street past the police station. Inwardly groaning, I hopped out to join the queue, mindful of the 50 person ticket issue whilst my partner found somewhere to park. Unfortunately for us, we were the unlucky ones getting our ticket at 48 and after having remained optimistic for 4 hours hoping against hope that it would not be in vain, the police then closed the doors.

By this stage, as you can imagine, we were incredibly fed up as this meant that we would have to try again another day. So we thought, why not try the police at Fuengirola as one of our neighbours had obtained theirs here, even though they lived outside their jurisdiction in Benalmadena. In contrast to the Torremolinos station, this one is bright and airy with a distinctly professional feel and comes complete with a translator on the doorstep who greets you as you enter and attempts to ensure that you know exactly where you are going. As we explained what we needed, thinking- its only a form that we need so surely we can get this here, we were advised that no, we would have to get this from Torremolinos. On the plus side, at least we had only wasted half an hour this time and now knew where the police station was if we ever needed it.

So, another day dawned and off we went on our merry way back to the hellhole that is Torremolinos police station. This time we left even earlier at 6.30, confident that this would be early enough to beat the queues. To our surprise, even on our arrival just before 7, there were a few people already queuing armed with supplies and little deck chairs. However, having got up at the crack of dawn seemed to have worked as far as being sure to get a ticket and being seen. After queuing for what seemed an eternity but was probably no more than 3 hours this time, we were finally seen by an official and were able to procure the form. We were advised to return it when complete and present it along with several copies and our passports. Our first true encounter with the National police was different, to say the least, as we found their manner very arrogant and gruff with a tendency to bark orders at everyone. However, as they would appear to carry guns, I guess they can behave pretty much as they like without anyone complaining too much.

So, mission nearly completed as we returned home with the precious form and rooted out a little dictionary in order to translate the words we did not understand. Returning the form was relatively straight forward as we did not need to queue this time and were advised that we should come back in 4-5 weeks when it would be ready for collection. All this palaver just to get a form to allow you to buy things or enable you to work seems absolutely ludicrous but I think, in hindsight, this was a good introduction into how officialdom works in Spain and just how incredibly slow it is to achieve anything. I can only hope that my own experience is not typical of other stations in Andalucia.

Fiona Kirkpatrick